Some people might claim that there’s nothing to science
That little of value results from it all
But I’m here to tell you today there’s a study
Perhaps causing doubters to stumble and fall
You see, thanks to science, we now know the answer
To a question that buzzed round our minds like a gnat
It’s a question of candy, delightful and sticky,
And whether that sweet stuff will make us all fat
And guess what? It turns out there’s no correlation
Between the consumption of candy and size
Of your waist or your skinfolds or other stuff, namely
Obesity factors or triglycerides
Of course, some might question the worth of the study
Because it just looked at how often they ate
All their candy, and yet it just didn’t consider
The quantity of the stuff heaped on their plate
While others might question the people who did it
And hint that the truth they’re unwilling to see
Just because all their funding was given by people
Whose goal is to grow the whole sweets industry
And as for the Luddites who question this study
I’ll tell them, “I think you've been touched in the head!
So shut up and leave me my Snickers and Skittles!
I’ll stay thin and healthy until I am dead!"
(Today's poem is based on this abstract: http://www.nutritionj.com/content/12/1/53/abstract and this summary article: http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2013-05/candy-totally-wont-make-you-fat-candy-association-funded-study-finds)
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